At some point, though, as parents, it becomes our job to allow our kids to experience their discomfort and not jump in and fix it for them.  In fact, sometimes, we are the source of their discomfort when we have to say "no".   

 

Teaching our children to tolerate their own discomfort is the greatest gift we can give our kids.

 

As parents, we have to be able to model this by tolerating our kids' discomfort ourselves.  Many parents will give into their children's requests or demands not because it's the right thing to do, but more often because it's too hard to listen to them be unhappy about our decisions.

 

Discomfort, however,  is a huge motivator!  For example, if your child really wants that toy at the store, after you have already said "no", let him be with his own discomfort so he can then decide to bring his own money with him the next time, or even earn money helping around the house so he can get that much-loved toy.  When your kids are fighting over the video games, for example, they are showing you that they are making a choice to fight rather than to compromise.  Taking the video games away  teaches them through the discomfort of losing that privilege, that hopefully they can make a different choice next time.